Someone whom I admire shared the following with me – I dare you and me to read it and live it…
10 Things Extraordinary People Say Every Day
Want to make a huge difference in someone’s life? They’re small things, but each has the power to dramatically change someone’s day. Including yours.
1) “Here’s what I’m thinking.”
You’re in charge, but that doesn’t mean you’re smarter, savvier, or more insightful than everyone else. Taking the time to explain your decisions opens those decisions up to discussion or criticism, and it also opens up your decisions to improvement. Authority can make you “right,” but collaboration makes everyone right – and makes everyone pull together.
2) “I was wrong.”
When you’re wrong, say you’re wrong. You won’t lose respect–you’ll gain it.
3) “That was awesome.”
No one gets enough praise. No one. Pick someone – pick anyone – who does or did something well and say, “Wow, that was great how you…” Praise is a gift that costs the giver nothing but is priceless to the recipient. Start praising.
4) “You’re welcome.”
Think about a time you gave a gift and the recipient seemed uncomfortable or awkward. Their reaction took away a little of the fun for you, right? The same thing can happen when you are thanked or complimented or praised. Don’t spoil the moment or the fun for the other person. The spotlight may make you feel uneasy or insecure, but all you have to do is make eye contact and say, “Thank you.” Or make eye contact and say, “You’re welcome. I was glad to do it.” Don’t let thanks, congratulations, or praise be all about you. Make it about the other person, too.
5) “Can you help me?”
When you need help, regardless of the type of help you need or the person you need it from, just say, sincerely and humbly, “Can you help me?” I promise you’ll get help. And in the process you’ll show vulnerability, respect and a willingness to listen, which, by the way, are all qualities of a great leader – and a great friend.
6) “I’m sorry.”
We all make mistakes, so we all have things we need to apologize for: words, actions, omissions, failing to step up, step in, show support… Say you’re sorry, say why you’re sorry, and take all the blame. No less. No more. Then you both get to make the freshest of fresh starts.
7) “Can you show me?”
Advice is temporary; knowledge is forever. Knowing what to do helps, but knowing how or why to do it means everything. When you ask to be taught or shown, several things happen: You implicitly show you respect the person giving the advice; you show you trust his or her experience, skill and insight; and you get to better assess the value of the advice. Don’t just ask for input. Ask to be taught or trained or shown. Then you both win.
8) “Let me give you a hand.”
Many people see asking for help as a sign of weakness. So, many people hesitate to ask for help. But everyone needs help. Offer in a way that feels collaborative, not patronizing or gratuitous. Then actually roll up your sleeves and help.
9) “I love you.”
No, not with inappropriate innuendo, but using words and/or actions everywhere you mean it – and every time you feel it. We are here to share God’s love.
10) Say Nothing.
Sometimes the best thing to say is nothing. Be quiet until you know exactly what to say – and exactly what affect your words will have.
Philippians 2:1-11 (NIV)
Imitating Christ’s Humility
“Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit, if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind.
Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.
In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus:
Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.
And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death— even death on a cross!
Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name,
that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth,
and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.”